Putting all my cards on the table, I am a huge “Assassin’s Creed” fanboy. There is not much they could have done outside of shipping out a gamebox full of camel spiders to my front door that would have made me dislike the game. Well, that or ship out a game that was technically broken, or a regression from the previous four titles in the series. Thankfully, “Assassin’s Creed 3” (which is actually the fifth game in the series) is not just another “Assassin’s Creed 2” game with a new coat of paint, as the last two were, but a completely different game experience that will leave your inner gamer squealing with joy. The game introduces a very different control scheme, along with several shocking advances in the intricate story that developer Ubisoft has crafted for us already, that is sure to make fans of the series pining for the next game as soon as they put the controller down. But before you can beg the company for another installment, you have to get through this one, and I, your humble yet always correct critic, will take you on a journey through the latest game to chronicle the secret war between the Assassin Order and the Templars (yes, those Templars).

When we last left our walking memory bank Desmond Miles, his brain had been locked in a coma-like state, and it was only through playing through “Revelations” were we able to wake him up. Now he is back on track, and trying to save the world from the upcoming Apocalypse predicted by the Mayans. The funny part is, even the game realizes how lame that sounds, and even chastises itself over it. But along with the humor is a rich story of intrigue and a race against the clock that quickly has you forgetting all about the cheesiness that usually goes along when talking about that particular end-of-the-world scenario. So Desmond and his friends have finally been directed to a hidden temple of sorts in upstate New York, but the door to the interior of the temple is locked behind a door with the super-advanced technologies of the First Civilization. Without knowledge of how to penetrate the defenses, Desmond hooks back up into the Animus to learn the secret to opening it by living the life of one of his ancestors. This time, instead of experiencing the life of the roguish Ezio Auditore da Firenze during the height of the Renaissance, you live the life of a Half-Mohawk Native American, Half-British Assassin named Ratonhnhaké: ton (or Connor as he goes by when in around non-Mohawks), who operated during the American Revolution. Just for the sake of ease, because I am an ignorant American who lacks the tongue for any other language other than English and Bad English, I am simply going to refer to him as Connor for the rest of the review. The bulk of the game is through the eyes of Connor as we follow him through his formative years, all the way to the end of the American Revolution. Though Connor is an outsider to both sides of his heritage, as well as a member of the enigmatic Assassins, his loyalties lie on a much more personal level than simple nationality or bloodline. The game’s advertizing, as well as the majority of the missions Connor takes part in, seem to indicate that he supports the Patriots over the British during the Revolution, but this can be quite misleading. Connor is opposed to the Templars only, and his various adventures simply have him diving tomahawk-first into a bunch of Redcoats more often than he slices-and-dices Minutemen. I don’t want to give too much of the story away, as the awesome historically accurate (no really, for a historical fiction, it is very well researched and fits well within our own recorded history) story is what is the best quality of the “Assassin’s Creed” series. But I will say however that you will be interacting with some of the most famous people from the era, such as George Washington and Ben Franklin. One of my personal favorites from the time period didn’t make an appearance in the game, but I can more than live with that considering the rest of the wonderful game.

The normal control scheme that fans of the series have gotten used to for the past four games has undergone a facelift. Well, more than a facelift. It is now almost completely unrecognizable save for a few similar button commands. And while this may throw off hardcore fans of “Assassin’s Creed” for a while, the streamlined nature of their new control direction can be learned rather quickly. Don’t worry my friends, soon you will not even have to think about it before you decide to stab a guy in the face. And speaking of casual murder, the fencing, almost Errol Flynn style of combat from Ezio’s games is completely gone here. This isn’t just a new character-model over the same character animations. Even when Connor does use a sword, it is a much more close, and brutal, form of sword fighting. But most of the time you will be utilizing Connor’s unique two-weapon murder-dance. Most weapons that Connor uses are doubled up: two flintlock pistols, two hidden blades, and my personal favorite, the tomahawk and knife combo. The game HUD has been simplified, and is less intrusive than before, leaving you free to focus more on the action on your screen. Now, the gameplay might be the weakest part of the game, if the game could be said to have any weaknesses. While the game didn’t have any insane, crash-inducing glitches, the game does have a number of bugs that I noticed. Such as if you try to enter a window that is close to the ground, or you try to hop up a tiny ledge, Connor goes flying into the air like someone shot his sneaky ass out of a trebuchet. And more than once, the lip synchronization went off from the audio. While none of these things are crippling and I’m sure they will be corrected in future patches, it does somewhat detract from the polish of the game at times.

Finally, the portion of the review that I care least about: the graphics. I’m not really a graphics man, truth be told. I grew up in an age of 8-bit plumbers stomping on really irate mushrooms, and I am still happy with that. But even I have to admit that “Assassin’s Creed 3” is gorgeous. The game engine has been upgraded to allow for thousands of character models to be perfectly rendered on the screen at once. And all of these character models are completely able to interact with you. And while the lack of intricate cathedrals of Rome, and the massive domed spires of Constantinople might make the game seem a bit less colorful than its previous installments, this is only true if you don’t consider nature to be equally as gorgeous as anything that man can construct. The Frontier is the most expansive environment that Ubisoft has ever created, and even the three other areas that you can travel to aren’t little ponds either. You can see the quaint cobbled streets of 18th century Boston and the sprawl of New York. And while none of the buildings hold a candle to the previous games, they feel very authentic, and you can still have freerunning fun all through them. And every time you set off on the high seas, the sea battles, and even just simple sailing in one direction, looks phenomenal! High graphics fans shouldn’t miss this one.

Once again, my bias in this review has to be stated, because if I weren’t a fan of the series, I wouldn’t have any idea what the hell was going on. If you haven’t played the previous games, you will be lost, so play them. Couldn’t hurt anything, as there are worse ways to waste your life. But everything considered, this is one amazing game. After the major disappointment of last review’s “Dishonored,” I really needed a good game to get the stink off of me. Well, “Assassin’s Creed 3” stinks in a whole different way; it smells of awesome game. Any flaws that the game might have are technical issues, and technical issues can be fixed with regular patches. Otherwise, “Assassin’s Creed 3” is a sexy, blood-filled, action-packed, story-driven, Revolution-causing, tale of gaming sweetness. Get it. Get it now. Or Connor will find you…